Time, you are no friend of mine. You pressure and never relent. You take and never return. You play and never rewind. It’s the eve of my 24th birthday and I sit quietly alone. I breathe softly as I carefully roll the bud between my fingers. A quarter of my life has passed me by. Since finishing undergrad, I’ve felt more mortal than ever before. I don’t feel old, I feel finite. I feel limited. I feel insignificant. I cant help it and I cant stop it. It’s time, and he’s sitting heavy on my shoulders.
We were cool when you got me to 16. My world opened up with the turn of a key. You had given me speed, power, control, independence, and most importantly, a place to shag. You weren’t bad when you got me to 18 either. You got me out of the house, buying porn, smoking cigarettes, and gave me the choice not to vote. At 21, I thought I could love you forever. You got me into new places and put every isle of the supermarket at my finger tips. Best of all, you got me really, really, really drunk. You’ve healed wounds for me, helped me grow, and your future self gives me hope… sometimes.
But what have you done for me lately? Nothing. Nothing but fuck me sideways. So ya know what? Fuck you, and fuck off. You’re taking everything that I value. My hair, my looks, and my certain twinkle. What pushes me over the edge is that you will take every single thing that I love. My mother, my father, my brothers, my tutu, my best friends and my Pua girl. One day you’ll take the love of my life. Then you’ll take me. Your unkind, unlovable, and a total bitch. You’re all alone and you don’t exist. What’s your angle? Where do you get off?
I’ll take your answer off the air time, for you are no friend of mine.